the child

“How is she?” she asked me.

“I don’t know, I’m not in touch with her”, I replied.

“Why?”

“I don’t know. Fate, I guess”, I employed my simplest, and easiest escape route.

That was that. It was a simple, statement, made unwittingly, unknowingly. Her eyes fell down. She was thinking, yet she wasn’t. She isn’t that complicated, to analyse and dissect things, I know that for a fact.

But at that moment, there were tears flowing down her cheeks. She started crying, and unlike me, she made no fuss about it. She cried, openly, and in an uninhabited fashion.

I’m not normally all that expressive, yet, I ran up to her, almost involuntarily. I held her, tight against my bosom. She was sobbing, and it was beyond control. Few things in this world move me more, and so I felt like crying myself, and yet tried to hold back – for I wouldn’t want her to know I am crying.

“Don’t cry”, is all I could muster and tell her.

“I really hope you are not hurt.”

“No”

“You are someone who would not even share things with anybody. You don’t talk about things; you tend to just keep them to yourself. Somewhere I keep feeling that the entire episode has hurt you quite badly, probably left an indelible scar in your heart. That’s what scares me”

“You are right about one thing – I do find it difficult to talk about my feelings. But, I am someone who forgets. It may not be easy to believe me, but I tend to drop things quite easily. Don’t worry”

She hadn’t stopped crying, and was now crying even more in my embrace, her little figure wrapped in my arms. If she herself is small – physically I mean – she has got a heart larger than many I’ve known. It made me sad that she was crying. Yet, in that sadness, there was a certain joy, of being together. In her embrace, I felt that comfort that words can not possibly describe. And I was asking myself who among the two of us was really the child.

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36 thoughts on “the child

  1. You said: your other blog – can we not post comments on it? What piqued your interest in particular?Trying to keep some puritans at bay.

  2. DEAR ALL,a lot of you have asked me the context or have probably (and rightly so) not understood the context of this post.believe me, this was intended to be so. and that is because i thought the ‘where’, ‘who’ and ‘why’ of this weren’t as important the emotions that went through this. i am not normally very emotional. or, i don’t express them too openly. but there was some of the most beautiful moments of uninhibited love and expression, and wanted to share it with you all. not sure if i have conveyed it well enough, but it was an attempt nevertheless.KESHI,not confusing at all.MISS IYER,no secret, madam. DB,lots of things – some of the posts – could relate to them, and wanted to write back, but figured i coulnd’t comment, so went to your other blog and left a comment :)oh, and theres another db!GAZAL,shouldv’e given a prologue, my initial comment, i hope would serve the purpose?oh, and i’m a simple brain too. no brain, if u like it that way :PARTI,absolutely, and well said!JUBIN,boy, u said it. sometimes, i just amunable to do it. need those shots to loosen up :)TA – remember reading it a long time ago, but don’t remember what i read :PADITI,both, u can say. for me, mostly. and for love.IWOBM,we’re brothers, dude. u seem to relate to a lot of the crap i dish out here. glad to know u 🙂

  3. I didn’t need a background story; the emotions came through loud and clear. Yes, I would always like to know the whole story but some are just too long and involved to tell and some just need to be private.I did want to say here that it’s okay to cry with our children. It helps let them know we are human. I always wondered why my mother only cried a few times around me. I still wonder.Have a beautiful day – to all of you.~ RS ~

  4. sometimes emotions are just for that moment – it doesn’t need anything else to explain why. The child could be anyone who is dear – the emotion of that of a dear one.

  5. I just wanted to make sure I understood correctly… I think that it is the most touching thing when someone cares so much that the idea that you might be in pain hurts them.. that is also rare

  6. You are human after allI’m kidding 😉 Of course you are, even if you’re not keen on talking about feelings and just want to move on all the time. But I can see how these emotions were important to you.

  7. KESHI,thanks, and thanks!IWOBM,weird huh? maybe there is a connection, only we don’t see it.and thanks!RS,i’m glad we could communicate through this post! and – to wonder, is a good thing, imho.ARPITA,may be you do, may be you don’t – who knows? :PJOLVIN,yes, of the moment. sometimes, also momentary, no? :)ADITI,yes, it is rare indeed – blessed to be around such people.DEVIL,oh yes, no kidding that – only human!i’m beginning to understand myself through this blog of mine u know :)DEEPTI,well said, meddumji :)ASH,thank you!

  8. Crying is not being a child…sobbing doesn’t make one a child either…its an expression…one of the most common and easily understood expressions, which say so much without words. Understand it, never question it! 😉

  9. managed 2 understand ur intent but bcoz i being the way i am, i believe that u write based on a real life experience and cudnt stop myself from wondering ‘who’ and i think i know who it is.-shek

  10. PHISH,yes, words written in sadness do have the ability to touch u.NABILA,welcome, and thanks for visiting :)yes, crying certainly is an expression, quite often questioned too.TRINNIE,good to hear from u at least. yes, doing good, thank god!SHEK,keep guessing ;)SMITA,yes, it does. thank you.VEENA,welcome aboard, and thanks for visiting :)NANDITHA,thanks!

  11. i know its a bit toooooo late to leave a comment for this post. but went thru it just now so thought i d just say what i want to…i can visualise the whole seen and the hurt and the love and the comfort and everything that u meant to express. But this post shows that u dont let go that easily..well we have our own excess baggage to carry until one day we decide that enough is enough.

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