on many occasions while wondering about the purpose of this blog, i’ve noticed that among other things, it has ended up being a sort of a journal of mine. i shall, hopefully, be able to sit back someday and read my own posts and notice, hopefully a certain evolution of thought. for we aren’t human if we don’t evolve through our lifetime, are we? in that context, i am grateful to this blog itself. and to all the wonderful people i have met here – for u’ve all helped me evolve in your own unique ways.
the past week or so has been quite depressing, what with the newspapers being filled with the horrific events at virgina tech. as if iraq and other such ghastly news items were not enough. and in the midst of all this, i read this little piece of news. it appeared on one of the popular newspapers here and though i had actually missed reading it, my father had specifically mentioned it to me, also saying that my blogger friends might be interested in it too. i am grateful for such nice things – they instil the much needed hope in me.
there has been lots happening, both at work and otherwise. and for those of you wondering about the absence of activity here – its just that. not any block, thankfully! nor do i think i shall ever have a block of that kind. especially when i have my shots of whiskey for company. my gratitude again to those who have been asking me to post – ur encouragement is precious.
i’ve never been the kind who can love unconditionally. however much i try, my love seems to be limited by my thoughts. i tend to judge, and my love quite unfortunately is reserved only for those that i think are deserving of it. in that sense, i suppose i have a long way to go. about a week ago, i moved into a new home (after what seems like ages of thinking and planning) and i now have a companion. a month ago, we were strangers – she and i. she saw my ad (or rather a rant, if i could call it that) on sulekha and responded and here we are, sharing a roof, the two of us. it is quite different from what i had expected, for my housemate can be quite caring – from making me breakfast to making sure everything is alright from time to time. in that sense, she is an inspiration – for it isn’t easy for me to love so easily. and i am grateful for the new home, the housemate and everything else.
although my inability to post gratitude in the last few weeks has at times irked me, i’ve sort of accepted the change. not that i don’t want to post gratitude. it is, in my opinion, one of the most wortwhile things i have done and i shall be ever grateful to this blogger friend for inspiring me to start doing it in the first place. for now, i am blissfully absorbed in my work – a joy that i am just beginning to discover. why would i be at my workplace on a weekend otherwise?
there is this friend, who just says hello just at this moment(on google chat) and tries co convince me that it is wrong to work on a weekend coz i don’t get paid extra for it anyways. how can i convince her that there isn’t anything really right or wrong? and that the true reward of our work, imho, is in the process of working and now in the result? but then, i am grateful for such people – they show me how strong thoughts and perceptions can be and teach me to be more open minded and accepting of others’ views. i am also, in a way also grateful at my inability to convince her otherwise. for if everybody thought the same way, this world qould be quite a boring place, wouldn’t it? like right now, how she is trying to convince me how wrong i am!
i got this message on SMS, among the dozen other pointless jokes, riddles and other such mindless stuff! i received from a friend of mine. this fellow was actually, at one point, my student and still continues to keep in touch –
‘laziness, meanness and hypocricy have covered the length and breadth of this country. can an intelligent person look at all this and remain quiet? let us start working!’
at a time when just about everybody in this country seems to be complaining about how everything is wrong, but not ONE person talks of what can be DONE, i am grateful for such inspiration, coming from a young mind as this.